Parenting
Beneath the surface of Mother's Day: four mums ...
In a commercialised society, Mother’s Day may simply be viewed as the next date after Valentine’s Day for which we are inundated with adverts for flowers, chocolates and saccharine cards. We are awash with images and quotations representing an idealised version of motherhood. How often do we stop and think about what dwells beneath these representations? And what is Mother’s Day like if you have a challenging, ambiguous or absent relationship with your mother?In the UK, Mothering Sunday has deep roots, with its origins in Greek and Roman springtime festivals that were held in honour of the mother goddesses Rhea and Cybele. As with many pagan festivals, these later became enveloped into the Christian calendar. Mothering Sunday, celebrated on the fourth Sunday in Lent, became the day on which people would visit their ‘mother’ church. Domestic servants were given the day off work, and families would reunite. Children would gather...
Beneath the surface of Mother's Day: four mums share their story
In a commercialised society, Mother’s Day may simply be viewed as the next date after Valentine’s Day for which we are inundated with adverts for flowers, chocolates and saccharine cards....
How adoptive parents can love biologically and ...
Adoptive parents like to believe that parenting their children is no different from parenting biological children. As adoptive parents, we cherish, treasure and love our children as passionately and deeply as if they were birthed from us. Parents who adopt their children as infants and toddlers may enjoy many years of family harmony before their children begin to signal unmet needs. Parents who adopt their children between the ages of four and eighteen will often be shown very quickly that biological parenting will be overwhelmingly inadequate to their children’s needs. Some families intuitively know that the behavioural challenges, emotional distance, physical defensiveness and spiritual depression in their children are related to adoption, but many families push that instinct out of their minds, assuming that it is taboo to consider. In my work with adoptive families, I see a disheartening pattern of families consulting with multiple therapists and providers only to...
How adoptive parents can love biologically and parent therapeutically
Adoptive parents like to believe that parenting their children is no different from parenting biological children. As adoptive parents, we cherish, treasure and love our children as passionately and deeply...
Zion Lights asks: can apps be helpful to gentle...
Apps are changing the way we use and treat information in significant ways and it’s a minefield to sort through the ones that are useful to our personal lifestyles and those that aren’t. As with many things, there are gains from using apps, depending on how they are used and the purposes they are used for. Nowhere is this murkier than when we consider natural parenting. Can apps help with natural parenting? The most popular parenting apps seem to be for keeping tabs on our children, and while I completely understand the need to know where your child is and that he is safe, it worries me that these apps have been accepted by parents worldwide without much debate into the privacy of our children. Not only do many of these apps track your child’s location, but they also tell you who the child is with, who she is interacting...
Zion Lights asks: can apps be helpful to gentle parents?
Apps are changing the way we use and treat information in significant ways and it’s a minefield to sort through the ones that are useful to our personal lifestyles and...
Why children use conflict in play and how to su...
This type of play happens quite often in our house, particularly at the moment. Had I not given it careful thought, I could easily have led myself down a path of intense worry about my son’s choice of activity. I could have been critical of myself for allowing such violent play. However, I did not do this.
Why children use conflict in play and how to support them
This type of play happens quite often in our house, particularly at the moment. Had I not given it careful thought, I could easily have led myself down a path...
“But do you still love them?”
Karen Hodgson celebrates her love for her adopted children I was sitting in the waiting area watching my eldest two children doing their gymnastics class; my youngest was snuggled into me, tired, sucking on a piece of apple and feeling my jumper between her thumb and finger as she is wont to do when trying to sleep, while I stroked her hair. Her sisters were doing their best to join in with the others; Liberty’s visible lack of coordination wrung my heartstrings as she tried and tried to balance on the beam, falling, climbing back up, falling again. I felt tears well up for her and wanted to rush and help, but I blinked them back, knowing I had to stay put. My throat felt tight and I had to remind myself to breathe as she tried again and got slightly further along before falling yet again. The other mums...
“But do you still love them?”
Karen Hodgson celebrates her love for her adopted children I was sitting in the waiting area watching my eldest two children doing their gymnastics class; my youngest was snuggled into...
Two Father Family: the joys and challenges of a...
Where it all began We both always wanted to be parents, though as younger adults, we never truly believed it would be possible. But then sometimes, the best things in life are unexpected… just like the day we first met. It wasn’t any kind of fairy tale; it was, in fact, quite awkward. We were out with our respective friendship groups when Rich walked past and slipped me a piece of paper with his name and number on it. At the same time, he tried to covertly tell me to meet him at the bar and that his friends didn’t know he was gay. We chatted briefly that evening and, a few days later, I messaged him and we arranged our first proper date. Since then, it’s been the most amazing journey that started with falling in love, followed by Rich opening up to his family and friends about being...
Two Father Family: the joys and challenges of adoption
Where it all began We both always wanted to be parents, though as younger adults, we never truly believed it would be possible. But then sometimes, the best things in...
